


Ace Aro Alpha FTW!

by darrinya



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Ahsoka is a shipper, Asexuality, Crack, Gen, coming out in the most awkward way possible
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-30
Updated: 2020-07-30
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:08:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25617850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darrinya/pseuds/darrinya
Summary: Ahsoka innocently queries whether Alpha has ever been in love with anyone, which leads to a ridiculous conversation about asexuality.
Kudos: 24





	Ace Aro Alpha FTW!

Much to Alpha’s chagrin, Commander Tano seemed to have picked up on her Master’s tendency to rush into things headfirst without stopping to think. He lost count of the number of times he had to haul her behind cover or drag her back to base before she gave away their position waving her sabers without giving a thought to who might be watching. 

Still, she was a good kid, even if she was a little overenthusiastic. Alpha gave her bonus points for not prattling on about  _ feelings  _ and  _ attachment _ . 

(Seriously, the way Skywalker talked, it was a miracle the entire galaxy didn’t know about him and his Senator.) 

Alpha didn’t have to ask what the general would be doing when Skywalker sent him off on another scouting mission. It was Anakin’s business, Alpha concluded grudgingly, and Skywalker had a right to attend to it even though he should’ve been meeting with his senior officers to assess their next move. 

He was on his way to the sector Skywalker had directed him to when he noticed Commander Tano sitting by herself, watching the activity in the hangar. With a sigh, Alpha changed course so he could talk to her.

“You waiting for someone, kid?” he asked. 

She shrugged. “Master Skywalker is busy, and I’m not much help here.”

“Want to come with me?” Alpha offered. He much preferred his own company in the field, but it wouldn’t hurt to have another set of eyes. And he was forced to admit that her Force sensitivity could be useful. 

Tano smiled and sprang to her feet. “I can keep up with an ARC.”

Alpha found himself liking her. Her energy reminded him of the ARC recruits he’d been responsible for on Kamino. He jerked his head towards the bay door. 

Tano was practically buzzing with energy. Alpha kept one eye on her. She was much more of a conversationalist than her Master. Part of him already regretted inviting her to tag along.

“Too bad Master Kenobi isn’t here,” the commander said thoughtfully. 

Alpha privately thought it was for the better that Kenobi was on the other side of the galaxy, so he settled for a shrug. 

“ Is he still stuck on Coruscant?” Tano wanted to know.

Alpha was about to shoot back that he was  _ not  _ responsible for Obi-Wan Kenobi, despite appearances, but he caught himself and muttered, “Don’t know. He’s probably off having tea with another duchess.”

“ Or maybe he and Master Skywalker are  _ both  _ having tea with their . . .  _ friends _ .”

“ Isn’t that stuff classified or something?” Alpha said. (What was it with these people and their illicit romances?)

Tano was grinning. “We both know my Master isn’t exactly subtle.”

“Did you agree to come out here just so you can talk about forbidden attachments or whatever it is you call it?”

“ Nooooooooooo?” Tano paused. “But . . . since we’re on that subject . . .”

Alpha’s eyes narrowed. He really didn’t like where this conversation was headed.

“ What?” he gritted out.

“ Have you ever . . .” Tano wiggled her eyebrows. “You know.”

Alpha felt the blood rush to his face. He halted in place and glared at Tano.

“Shut up,” he hissed. “Just . . . shut up. This conversation is not happening right now. This conversation is never going to happen  _ ever. _ Clear, Commander?”

T ano pouted. “I was just asking. Skyguy told me that you were too grumpy for anyone to like you that way, but I don’t think that’s true. You’re nice when you’ve had enough caf.”

“I told you we aren’t having this conversation!” Alpha yelled. A few random shinies paused to stare at them, but they scattered with lightning speed after Alpha meaningfully tapped his blaster.

“Heyyyyyy.” A look of dawning realization appeared on Tano’s face. “Is the reason you don’t have a girlfriend because you’re actually . . . not into that sort of thing?”

Blessed relief.  _ Thank you, Tano. _

Unfortunately, Tano kept talking.

“Cos I know a couple guys like that,” she said blithely. “I thought it was kinda weird at first, but love is love, y’know? So no judgment.”

“ What?” Alpha asked, totally confused.

“ You like guys, right?”

Alpha stared at Tano for two beats. Four. He took in a shuddering breath.

“We’re done here,” he said in the calmest voice he could muster under the exasperating circumstances.

“ Aw, Alpha, you don’t have to be shy.” With an air of dignified patronization, Tano added, “We all know about Master Kenobi.”

“What. The actual. KRIFF?!” Alpha shouted.

With much distress, Tano asked, “You mean Rex was wrong about that? Stang, usually his gossiiiiiii--iiiiiiintel is super reliable.”

“REX TOLD YOU  _ WHAT?” _

“There’s no need to shout,” Tano said with a huff.

“I’m going to kill him,” Alpha hissed.

Wait, no, first he was going to kill Skywalker for being a bad influence and making Tano think about this stuff. Then, he was going to kill Kenobi--no one could rightly accuse him of being with that hapless excuse of a Jedi if Kenobi were dead.  _ Then,  _ Alpha would kill Rex.

Churchyard biddy, indeed.

“I can feel your homicidal thoughts through the Force,” Tano informed him. “Stop plotting murder when the kids are around. It stilts their emotional growth.”

“What kids?”

Tano jerked her thumb in the direction of the shinies who were lingering around, trying to act like they had something to do and were totally not eavesdropping. Wonderful. Alpha was willing to bet Skywalker’s  _ special friend’s _ penthouse on this gossip reaching Coruscant by nightfall.

“I’m not dating anyone,” Alpha hissed. “I don’t want to date anyone, I never will date anyone, and for kriff’s sake, I’m most definitely not dating karking Kenobi!”

Tano giggled. “Karking Kenobi.” She bent over, laughing hysterically.

“THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT!”

“You gotta admit, it was an unfortunate word choice.”

Alpha groaned. “I hate this conversation,” he said.

“Come on, Alpha,” Tano persisted, “there has to be at least  _ one _ person you’ve liked. What about that one chick you saved from getting split in half on Dorumaa?”

“Annoying and whiny.”

“The guy we met at the bar when Fives was bored, and there was nothing to do?”

“Ugly.”

“Master Kenobi?”

“I TOLD YOU NO!”

Tano thought hard for a few moments, then offered hopefully, “Rex?”

Alpha was horrified. “We’re  _ brothers. _ That’s--that’s--that’s  _ disgusting!” _

“Come on, Alpha, work with me,” Tano complained with a petulant frown. “I can’t do all the legwork here. Are you seriously telling me that you’ve never,  _ ever _ had a crush on  _ anyone?” _

“Yes,” Alpha said.

Tano pondered this for a few seconds, and Alpha was filled with relief.  _ Finally. _ She was getting it. No one ever had before, not even his fellow ARC brothers.

“You just haven’t met the right one yet,” Tano declared firmly.

Well, there went that dream.

“That’s not it,” Alpha said.

Tano crossed her arms and glared at Alpha.

“Well, explain it, then,” she retorted.

“That’s what I’ve been trying to do!”

Tano did not look impressed. Alpha rubbed his face, then sat down on a pile of droids. Tano sat next to him.

“Okay, it’s like this,” Alpha said. “I’ve heard all you mongrels and some of the  _ vode _ yap about this . . . this . . .”

“Love?” Tano prompted.

“Yeah.” Alpha wrinkled his nose. “That.” He met Tano’s eyes and was surprised to see Tano taking in his words intently. At least she was  _ listening. _ Alpha had that much going for him. “From what I can tell,” Alpha said carefully, “you . . . see people or meet them, and they make you feel . . .”

“Happy?” Tano supplied. “Giddy? All tingly inside?”

Alpha cast a sharp look at Tano. It was hard to see with her skin color, but the young commander actually appeared to be blushing. He made a mental note to keep an eye on that--Tano was way too young to get involved like Skywalker idiotically did, and the last thing the troops needed was another lovesick officer.

“That doesn’t happen,” Alpha said. Tano opened her mouth again, and Alpha cut her off: “And don’t tell me that it’s because I haven’t met the right one yet because that’s  _ osik. _ ”

“How do you know?” Tano asked. “I mean, how would you know if you haven’t met the right one?”

Alpha massaged the bridge of his nose. How to explain this? It was something that Alpha just  _ knew _ that everyone else seemed incapable of understanding.

“Have you ever seen someone that you barely know or that you have never even talked to, and they just look . . .” Alpha struggled to find the right words. He had heard his brothers talk about it, but saying it out loud made him feel like a cheesy fool. Mostly because his brothers  _ were _ cheesy fools. “They look nice. They make you feel excited, and you don’t even know them. You’re not thinking about marriage or dating; you’re just noticing that they’re . . .”

“Cute?” Tano finished.  _ Definitely _ blushing.

Alpha said, “I don’t get that. I never did.”

“Huh.” Tano’s mouth fell open. “Ever?”

“Ever,” Alpha confirmed.

“Wow.” Tano sat back on the droid pile. Alpha had to reach an arm out to keep her from falling backwards. “That’s really weird.”

Alpha felt his lips twist into a grimace. He should have known this was how the conversation would end.

All of a sudden, Tano turned her face up to Alpha’s and smiled.

“But it’s you, I guess,” she said. “I don’t understand it, but . . . it’s nice. I’m glad you told me.”

She got up from the droid pile with a bounce of her head tails.

“Come on,” she said. “We better start scouting, or else Skyguy’ll get mad.”


End file.
